Day 259 - Reasons

Good morning lovelies.
I hope this post finds you all well and enjoying the day.
Me?
I am okay, all things considered.
I still want to beat my head off a wall anytime I hear one of our songs,I do not have much of an appetite, and I still catch myself thinking of him in the fleeting hours of the morning, but other than that, I am dealing.
Today I am going to post my list of reasons for getting thin and perfect in the new year.
So...

"My Incentives to Achieve Perfection"
1. First and foremost, boys are stupid. I am not going to be perfect for any guy. I am going to be perfect for myself, and myself alone.
2. I want to be healthier. As of now, I am overweight, and I want to get my BMI into a healthier range.
3. I want to be able to wear anything. I see so many cute clothes these days, and I cannot wear them because I am a size 10 instead of a 2, a L instead of a S or XS.
4. I want to be more confident in my own skin. Honestly, I have never been proud of the way that I look, and it is time for that to change.
5. I just want to be happy again. I think gaining confidence is definitely going to help with that.

That is my list.
Hooray.
I am going to go comment on blogs today, because I have missed doing it.
I hope you all have a wonderful day.
I love you all so much!
Stay positive, stay beautiful! <3

Food:
- 1 biscuit with butter and honey (252 calories)
- 1 Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki 6" sub from Subway (370 calories)

Total: 622 calories thus far (1:32 pm)

I thought you should know...

...that my boyfriend of one year, eight months broke up with me tonight.
Via email.
I am no longer sad about it.
More pissed.
And more motivated than ever to be the best I can be.
<3

Day 255 - The Beginning of Perfection

Good morning lovelies.
My plan is being put into action today, not the fifth, haha.
I got on the scale yesterday and just about died.
Granted, I was still on my period, but nonetheless.
So today, since that is all over, I begin my reinvention.
Again.
Hahaha!
I am super excited.
I can see me now...
*dies of happiness*
I shall be perfect.
So perfect.
I cannot wait.
I will post my weight after my shower.
I promise to be a much better commenter now!
I have been in a weird mood these past few days...
But no more!
I have to figure out what I want to get my boy for his Christmas present, haha.
He is coming down to spend New Year's with me.
I am so excited!
It has been almost three months since I have seen him.
I want to get him something really special and meaningful.
I will probably go to the personalized jewelry kiosk in the mall and see if they have anything good. :)
I hope that you all had a wonderful Christmas, if you celebrate it.
I love you all so very much!
Stay positive, stay beautiful! <3

Weight = 138 lbs.

First goal = 133 lbs. on January 10th.

Food:

soft pretzel - 190 calories
lasagna roll up - 330 calories
chocolate covered peanut butter Ritz cracker sandwich - 389 calories (*sigh*)
Nemo gummies - 15 calories

Total: 924 calories

Day 252 - A Decision

January 5, 2012.
500 calories a day.
No more.
It takes hard work to be perfect.
<3

Day 250 - Ho, Ho...Oh, Hell...

Hello lovelies.
Here's hoping you had a wonderful day.
I did not.
I had the intake from Hell today.
I did really, really good up until dinner time.
Then we went to a pizza buffet.
And who stuffed herself like a fat pig?
Moi.
Cheers.
It was like this:
Control?
What is this 'control' of which you speak?
I clearly have none.
What I would not give for a laxative right now.
Or the ability to puke.
I know that sounds awful but I feel like crap.
Here is hoping tomorrow will be better.
Mom and I are baking cookies tomorrow.
I will not eat a single one.
Because I am strong, no matter how many stupid slip ups I may have.
Hope you all had a fantastic day.
Stay positive, stay beautiful. <3

Food:

I'm not even going to post it. That's how bad it was.

Total: I am a fat pig. Oink oink.

Edit: Junk food = nature's perfect laxative. Need I say more?


This pretty much sums up my feelings about myself right now. Ugh.

Day 249 - Eff You, Mother Nature

Hello lovelies.
Hope you all had a fantastic day.
Mine was...okay.
Four days before Christmas and I get blindsided by my lovely period.
Seriously, Mother Nature, what did I ever do to you to deserve this?
This means I am going to have it on Christmas.
Boo! :(
I feel like someone is repeatedly punching me in the stomach.
Not a nice experience.
I have been reading blogs as they have been updated today, but I have not been commenting as I should.
I shall fix that shortly.
May try to fit in some exercise later, we will see.
I am tired tonight. :\
I really need to be more disciplined.
I ate some pumpkin roll.
So good for the two minutes I was eating it, but now there is the guilt.
Oh, sigh.
At least I managed to stay under 1,000 calories today.
That is always my goal.
I hope you ladies had a wonderful day and are enjoying a nice night as well. :)
Stay positive, stay beautiful. <3

Food:

Nemo multivitamin gummies – 15 calories
1 cup Cinnamon Burst Cheerios – 110 calories
½ cup skim milk – 40 calories
5 peanut butter pretzel nuggets – 70 calories
chicken noodle casserole – 390 calories
1 slice pumpkin roll – 279 calories

Total: 904 calories


She is so beautiful and tiny, it makes me want to throw something at her, but alas, I love her, so I will not. :)

Day 248 - Bouncing Back

Good morning lovelies!
I hope this post finds you all well.
I had a major slip-up last night.
Binge from Hell?
You bet.
But you know what?
I no longer feel any negativity about it.
Every road has bumps in it.
Things are going to happen that knock us off our beaten path, and we have to simply dust ourselves off and carry on.
Today is a new day, and I am going to make it so much better than yesterday.
I have decided that I am reducing my calories to no more than 950 a day.
The 950 will be reserved for weekends.
I am getting real inspiration from Wintergirls.
I love the book so much, I could read it over and over and never tire of it.
I want to be a wintergirl, light as air and graceful.
I have these visions in my head of how I wish to look when I hit goal.
I wish I could draw so someone would know how I envision myself when I am perfect. :)
My plan is to finish Wintergirls today, and do God only knows what else.
OH!
My grades are in.
I got straight A's!
Another 4.0 for my college transcript. :)
I am so happy and proud, especially because this was the semester from Hell.
Anyway, I hope you all have a wonderful day!
Stay positive, stay beautiful! <3

Food:

pizza pocket – 350 calories
1 cup lettuce – 8 calories
fat free Italian dressing – 15 calories
2 cups rigatoni – 440 calories
¼ cup sauce – 35 calories

Total: 848 calories

Damn right, it does, and we will all be skinny one day. <3